


Marbles

by sdwolfpup



Series: The Formula One verse [2]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Behind the Scenes, Commentary, F/M, Gen, Meta, Prompt Fill, a variety of stuff, drabbles and meme answers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:01:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 12,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sdwolfpup/pseuds/sdwolfpup
Summary: Marbles: "Small pieces of rubber that are shredded from the tires during cornering, which build up off the racing line. Running onto them mid-race can be treacherous as they prevent the tire making proper contact with the road, thereby reducing grip. Driving over them after the checkered flag, however, is a nifty tactic the drivers use to try and make sure their cars aren’t underweight at the race end."A collection of short drabbles, meme prompt answers, fill-in/extra scene requests, meta about, and fanart set in the Formula One 'verse from Heart Full of Gasoline.
Relationships: Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth
Series: The Formula One verse [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1647262
Comments: 229
Kudos: 226





	1. Table of Contents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A quick-read summary and links to what content is in this collection. Everything set in or related to my Formula 1 verse from Heart Full of Gasoline.

**Meme Responses**

1\. [No Excuses Writing Meme: POV change request (Hyle at the bar POV)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918876/chapters/54783067) \- set in April, Lannister Corp Racing

2\. [No Excuses Writing Meme: Before the beginning (Brienne POV)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918876/chapters/54783151#workskin) \- set pre-story, January, Lannister Corp Racing

3\. [No Excuses Writing Meme: Jaime & Brienne missing scene prompt (Jaime POV)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918876/chapters/54783259#workskin) \- set November, Lannister Corp Racing

4\. [No Excuses Writing Meme: Tywin POV prompt (Tywin POV)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918876/chapters/54783421#workskin) \- set February, Evenstar Racing

5\. [No Excuses Writing Meme: POV Change request (Hyle at Tywin's party POV)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918876/chapters/54783478#workskin) \- set in June, Lannister Corp Racing

6\. [No Excuses Writing Meme: Before the beginning (Young Brienne POV)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918876/chapters/54783511#workskin) \- set years pre-story

**Extra/Fill-in Scenes**

1\. [Jaime Lannister and Addam Marbrand Read Thirst Tweets](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918876/chapters/55643035#workskin) \- Jaime POV, set September, Evenstar Racing; fluffy fill-in that is exactly what the title suggests

2\. [Drive to Survive Westeros: Competitive Spirit](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918876/chapters/64435159) \- in the style of the Netflix documentary, a look at Brienne's second year in F1 focused solely on her social media oneupmanship with Robb.

3\. [The MOT Test](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918876/chapters/67041304) \- Peck asks Brienne to come with him to his car's annual MOT test, to protect him from an untrustworthy mechanic; the mechanic has no idea she knows what she's talking about

**Meta/DVD Commentary About the Fic and Writing Process**

1\. DVD Commentary Meme: [July, Lannister Corp Racing, King's Landing Motorcyle Ride](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918876/chapters/57994702#workskin)

2\. DVD Commentary Meme: [Favorite Line](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918876/chapters/57994846#workskin) (line is from November Pt. 1, Lannister Corp Racing)

**Miscellaneous Stuff**

1\. [Collected fanart](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918876/chapters/60011335#workskin) by other talented fans!


	2. No Excuses Writing Meme: POV change request (Hyle at the bar POV)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompted by twelvemonkeyswere on tumblr

**April - Hotel bar**

Hyle Hunt had learned a few things as an F1 driver: never drink too much the night before a race; don’t let Randyll Tarly see you slacking off; and never drink with Euron Greyjoy, because the man had no limits and wouldn’t hesitate to try cheating another man out of free booze. 

Hyle wasn’t sure how he’d gotten roped into this post-race evening with Euron and Ramsay but it was one hundred percent Ron’s fault. His teammate hadn’t learned any lessons being in F1, which was why Hyle was the primary Griffin driver and Ron wasn’t. Better to have a shit secondary than to be a good secondary, Hyle always said. He wasn’t in F1 to block cars for someone else, he wanted to win. 

“Did you see the tits on that trophy girl today?” Euron drawled. “I’d like to spray some champagne all over her.” Hyle grunted in agreement, trying to not engage. He agreed with Euron - the woman had been busty and beautiful - but he didn’t want to bond with the man over shared sexual drooling. Why couldn’t he just jerk off to his fantasies privately like the rest of them? 

“Kingslayer!” Ramsay yelled, startling Hyle out of his annoyance. 

Ugh. Jaime Lannister. He was dressed in all black, trying to make some moody statement for all Hyle knew, and he seemed uninterested in joining them, which Hyle was fine with except Ramsay called to him again and the other driver frowned and headed their way. 

Somehow Jaime had snagged Brienne Tarth as first his mechanic and then his race engineer, and given the season he was already having, it seemed like that one move had changed his fortunes, and definitely his sponsor’s money. No one deserved good fortune less than Lannister, an aging, arrogant prick who wasted whatever Seven-given talent he had. 

To be fair to Lannister, though, Hyle hadn’t even known Brienne was a mechanic. Who knew the tall, ugly girl from Tarth had it in her? 

Hyle was almost relieved when Euron prodded him to buy the next round of drinks - even though he had bought the last round he didn’t want to seem cheap in front of Lannister, especially when the other man ordered the most expensive alcohol on the menu. Fucking typical, trying to make Hyle feel like he wasn’t as well-off. 

He sauntered over to the bar and ordered another pitcher of beer and a whiskey for Lannister, his eyes drawn to the TV where they were showing the recap of the day. There was the woman in question, just as rabbit-toothed and freckled as ever. She looked worse somehow with her hair pressed down by the headphones, her face scrunched in concentration. She’d been nice enough, though, back in F2, and eager to learn. She’d listened well, and picked things up quickly. It hadn’t even been that much of a burden to ask her out as part of the bet, though Ron had ruined that before anyone could collect. 

There was laughter over at the table and he picked up the pitcher and tumbler and turned towards the to see what was so funny, when Ron said something and Jaime seemed to lose his mind and punched Ron harder than Hyle had ever seen someone hit another man in person. The sound of it was excruciating, meaty and crunching, and then lost in the crash of Ron’s body and the glassware all over the floor. Around them the other bar patrons were shooting to their feet in surprise. 

“Her name is Brienne,” Jaime snarled - actually snarled! - and Ron, fucking stupid Ron, just cowered on the floor in terror while Hyle gaped in shock. 

Jaime turned towards Hyle and for a moment he was certain the man was going to hit him, looked like some movie star version of the Warrior, or the Stranger, ready to bring death to anyone who stood in his way. But instead Lannister just grabbed the whiskey out of Hyle’s hand, downed it quickly, and then threw it at Ron’s feet before saying “thanks for the drink” - and gods for a moment Hyle had to admire the sheer machismo of the man - before leaving just as quickly as he’d arrived. 

Hyle got close enough to set the pitcher down on their table while Euron burst into raucous laughter and Ramsay helped a furiously trembling Ron to his feet. 

“What the fuck did you do?” Hyle asked. 

“None of your fucking business,” Ron mumbled out of an entirely too bloody mouth. 

“Well I’m not paying for the mess,” Hyle said. He poured himself a drink and sat down on his still standing stool. See? He had machismo too.


	3. No Excuses Writing meme: Before the beginning (Brienne POV)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompted by firesign23 on tumblr

It was easy to be alone with cars. Cars didn’t ask for anything, they didn’t judge how someone looked. They were just finely - and sometimes poorly - crafted pieces of rubber and plastic and steel that waited for a knowing hand to bring them to life. 

Brienne had spent most of her life around cars, her earliest memories sitting high up on her father’s shoulders and watching the race cars whiz around Evenfall track. If she concentrated really hard, she could see her mother there, too, but her memory faded more every year, no matter how hard Brienne stared at photographs. Galladon’s bright smile was still vivid, like it was refracting the sun into her eyes and all she could see was the light of it. 

Cars had not made fun of her for crying huge, ugly tears when first her mother and then her brother had died. Cars had been sitting patient and ready when she’d run back to Tarth from her disastrous time at Griffin. Cars had provided logical puzzles that Brienne could actually solve when the world seemed to be nothing but unsatisfactory mysteries after Aerys Targaryen had died on the track at Dragonstone and the racing world had argued itself into exhaustion about whether Jaime Lannister had done it on purpose. 

It was easy to be alone with them, but, Brienne thought as she screwed an alternator onto an engine bloc, she was tired of being alone. Her dad was there, two cars over and humming under his breath to the music on the radio, but the older she got the more she realized how sad it was that the two most important relationships in her life were her father and her teenage neighbor. Brienne had thought cars would be enough, but here heading into her late twenties, her life was starting to feel too comfortably alone and quiet. She didn’t need a great adventure, but she could really use a friend. 

In the garage waiting area, the bell on the door jingled.


	4. No Excuses Writing meme: Jaime & Brienne Prompt (see summary for details)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beware spoilers for Lannister Corp: September chapters and beyond. 
> 
> Prompt from needglam: "Jaime and Brienne discuss the challenges of performing everyday tasks with one hand until Jaime awkwardly brings up making love with one hand and then things get heated/emotional for a moment."

“You’re a taskmaster,” Jaime complained. Again. 

“You’re unoriginal,” Brienne said from her perch on the couch, apparently unbothered by his entirely legitimate issues. It was the Friday before the Dragonstone Grand Prix and Brienne had made him take his laundry, crumpled and stuffed into a bag she’d brought for him, down to his building’s renters-only laundromat, offering her company but not her help. Now he had the clothes dumped in a heap on his coffee table and he was trying to fold them one-handed. 

“I have a service for this,” he’d said when she first suggested it and she had looked so offended he’d done as she asked. He knew how to do laundry - he wasn’t entirely hopeless - but most of his pre-amputation clothes were dryclean-only anyway. This was the most days in a row he’d worn sweats since he was a child. And even then, Tywin Lannister had preferred his children in nice jeans and corduroys. 

“You’re really not going to help me?” he asked, giving her his best Sad-Eyed Orphan look. 

Brienne lifted one pale eyebrow. “Practice will make it easier.” 

He grunted and grabbed the next piece of clothing, a pair of boxers, which he laid down on the couch and folded in half. “I hate that I have to practice basic life skills now,” he said, and he’d meant it as a joke but it came out far too serious. 

“Just for awhile,” Brienne said gently, “until you get it.” 

“I shouldn’t have to get folding underwear. Or washing my hair. Or getting the mail. I should just be able to do them.” 

“It sounds frustrating,” she agreed. 

“Everything is like that! It all takes longer and I’m worse at all of it. There are whole areas of my life I haven’t even tried yet that are going to be awful - cooking actual meals, wrapping presents, having sex.” 

Brienne went ramrod straight and her hand, which had been idly playing with the fabric of the folded boxers, stilled. He couldn’t look away from her thick, rough fingers on the black silk. He imagined her pulling the underwear off of him, balancing himself as he stepped out of them with his stump on her shoulder, his good hand curled in her hair. He wouldn’t need two hands to cradle her head if she stayed kneeling and eager and-

Jaime inhaled a shuddering breath and turned his back on her, grabbing a handful of clothes and holding them clenched protectively to hide his very obvious arousal. Sweat pants were terrible at hiding erections, he was discovering. 

“Here, let me help you,” she said and for a moment Jaime thought she meant with his most immediate problem, but she was staring pointedly at the laundry pile even though her cheeks were bright red and her eyes were lit with a fire he was painfully familiar with. It may have only been physical for her, but that part at least she’d been happy with. Jaime nodded at her and she grabbed a pair of pants and made swift work of them, giving them the amount of attention a person would normally save for a thousand piece puzzle. 

He was happy with her now, here in this domestic space between that they’d constructed. Someday this space would surely collapse but as they silently folded laundry together, he was grateful that it was the one thing he’d done better with one hand than with two.


	5. No Excuses Writing meme: Tywin Prompt (see summary for details)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompted by seraliceterrant on tumblr: Tywin in disbelief at no-shows during the winter car launch at Sunspear

Tywin had expected the crowd to be thinner. He was not, contrary to his youngest son’s fervent wishes, an idiot. But he did not expect this desolate wasteland when the Lannister Corp car launch was only two minutes away. He knew of course where everyone had hurried off to; the noise from the end of the garages was unmistakable. There were some reporters tarrying out front of the Lannister Corp garage but they were all back-ups for the big stations, as far as he could tell. It was insulting on every level and of course it was because of Jaime and that Tarth woman. Tywin was certain they wanted more than just a chance for a woman to drive in Formula 1. Why else would they have stolen his team’s LST when Jaime surely knew that the Lannister name needed it to survive? How had Tywin failed so completely in teaching his son the importance of legacy?


	6. No Excuses Writing Meme: POV change request (Hyle at Tywin's party POV)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> POV change requested by it-may-be-dull-but-im-determined on tumblr

He is horny. This is not an exceptional state of affairs for Hyle, but it is ill-timed given he’s in the middle of Tywin Lannister’s birthday party which means he’s surrounded by blonde Lannisters and nearly every other F1 driver and the pool of options for available women is more crowded than usual.

It doesn’t mean he’s without hope. He’s an attractive man and he’s not Lannister rich - who is, really? - but he does well for himself and he’s a mid-field driver, not one of those losers at the back, so overall he’s a good catch.

Hyle is scanning the crowd for a likely target when a very unlikely target catches his eye. It’s Brienne Tarth and she looks…good, he has to admit, in the silky blue dress with the slit up her long leg. Huh. He wouldn’t have thought that muscled, mannish body could be flattered with clothes but someone knew what she was doing when she dressed Brienne. Hyle was certain Brienne wouldn’t have picked that dress out herself.

He does have business with her, so even though he’s still horny, he puts a hold on that part of his evening and watches Brienne. She’s with Lannister, and then with Lannister’s dwarf brother, and then the Stark girls and just as Hyle is starting to regret wasting all this time just to talk to her, he sees that big Stark mechanic stalk up and suddenly Hyle’s own future looks a lot brighter. Hyle is horny, but he’s also a hero, and he can save this maiden from the loutish brute she is obviously uninterested in. She’ll be thrilled to have him step in, he’s sure of as he smoothes down the lapels of his suit jacket and goes to rescue her.


	7. No Excuses Writing meme: Before the beginning (young Brienne POV)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompted by twelvemonkeyswere on tumblr

Evenfall track had never hosted an F2 race before, and Brienne was giddy with excitement, dragging her father through the crowds so fast behind her she could feel him slipping from her grasp. It was almost time for the driver’s parade, and she wanted a good seat so she could see them up close, especially Renly Baratheon, who was driving today and the local favorite of Tarth. His merchandise was everywhere, and she’d even gotten his autograph on her program yesterday during the FanZone event.

Unfortunately the Kingslayer was here, too, and he was the clear favorite to win, dominating F2 almost from the moment he’d re-joined it. As the drivers were trundled around the track in the back of the long, flatbed truck, he was the only one not waving to the crowds, his arms crossed over his chest as he looked bored out at the crowds. Brienne barely gave him a second thought and instead shouted for Renly, waving wildly when he turned his beaming white smile their way.


	8. Jaime Lannister and Addam Marbrand Read Thirst Tweets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hi, I'm Jaime Lannister with Evenstar Racing.”
> 
> “And I'm Addam Marbrand, also with Evenstar Racing.”
> 
> Jaime held up his giant plastic mug. “And we're here to read thirst tweets!” Addam clanked his mug against Jaime's like they were toasting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I watched a lot of 'Celebs Read Thirst Tweets' for this, so most (but not all) of these are pulled from that. This is very silly. I hope you enjoy. :)

“You're sure about this?” Pia walked backwards in front of them as they crossed the asphalt from the Evenstar offices to the garage. She nimbly managed to avoid tripping over anything, even though she kept her eyes mostly trained on their faces. 

“Yes! It'll be fun,” Jaime assured her, and Addam nodded enthusiastically. 

“And Brienne is okay with it?”

“She's the one who came up with the idea,” Addam said, smirking. 

“Oh. I thought it was you.”

“Nope! They contacted her first and she told them we should do it.” 

Jaime snorted and pointed to Brienne waiting by the garage door for them. She waved a little and the three of them waved back. “She's supposed to be working out but she talked Syrio into moving her exercise time later so she could watch. Trust me, she's fine with it.” 

They got near and Jaime jogged ahead to give her a big, smacking kiss. “I hope you wrote some of these tweets,” he said, grinning. 

“Just the ones for Addam,” she said lightly and he laughed as Addam held the door open and they all filed in. 

They'd set up two chairs in front of Brienne's car, which was sparkling clean. 

“Thanks again for doing this,” the twenty-something producer said, shaking everyone's hands. “And for letting us use the car as a backdrop. Way cooler than the blue sheet.” 

He and Addam got settled in the movie-set-style chairs and Brienne stood behind the small handeld camera on a tripod, grinning. Pia came over with two giant mugs and handed one to each of them. On the side each one said 'Thirst Tweets' in cheerful letters, with little water emojis all around. 

“So we're just going to start filming and you two say who you are, what you're doing here, and then take turns pulling a piece of paper out of your mug and reading it. Sound good?”

They both nodded. 

“Great! 3...2...1...” he pressed a button on the small video camera and pointed at them. 

“Hi, I'm Jaime Lannister with Evenstar Racing.”

“And I'm Addam Marbrand, also with Evenstar Racing.”

Jaime held up his giant plastic mug. “And we're here to read thirst tweets!” Addam clanked his mug against Jaime's like they were toasting. 

“Should I go first?” Addam asked, opening his mug. 

“Yes, definitely.” 

Addam pulled out a slip of paper, read it and broke into a smile. “'I bet Addam Marbrand is GREAT in bed.'” He looked directly at the camera. “That's a safe bet.” 

Jaime snickered and pulled out his first slip of paper and started reading: “'Jaime Lannister is aggressively good looking. It's so rude.' Well, sorry, I guess?”

“You're not sorry,” Addam said on a laugh.

“No, I'm not.” 

Addam read his next tweet: “'I want to climb Addam Marbrand like a tree and never let go.' You'd have to at some point, though. You need to eat.”

“What kind of tree are you, do you think?”

“What?”

“Like, are you a pine tree or a willow or what?” 

Addam considered it. “What kind of tree has hard wood?”

They both burst out laughing and behind the camera Brienne covered her face with her hand but he saw her shoulders shaking. 

“Okay, my turn,” Jaime said, grabbing another one. “'Next year's f1 regs should be updated so Jaime Lannister cannot wear shirts at the track.'” He grinned at Brienne. “Are you sure you didn't write any of these?” She stuck out her tongue at him. 

“Oh this is a good one,” Addam said, chuckling. “'I bet Addam Marbrand has a huge dick.' Lot of you out there making such obvious bets,” he drawled. 

Jaime leaned back in his chair out of Addam's line of sight and held his hands just an inch from each other and then pointed at Addam. Addam looked back at him with narrowed eyes. 

“What are you doing?”

“Nothing. My turn!” Jaime chirped. He scanned the paper and laughed a little, realizing they were getting into the genuinely thirsty tweets now. “'Jaime Lannister's face? A seat!' That's, uh, I mean my nose might get in the way but maybe that's a feature and not a bug.” 

Addam snorted loudly and read from his next tweet: “'Addam Marbrand makes me sooooo wet. That's the tweet.'”

“I like how you pronounced that soooooo.”

“Yeah? Sooooooo.”

“Sooooooooooooo.”

They cracked up and then Jaime grabbed his next paper. “'I've had a boner for Jaime Lannister for fifteen years.' Wow, you might want to go see a doctor about that.”

“The blood pressure problems alone.” 

Jaime threw his head back and laughed while Addam fished around for his next paper. 

“'I want Addam Marbrand to suffocate me between his thighs.' Uh. Okay. Sounds unpleasant for you, though.” 

“Maybe they like that.”

“Maybe.” Addam tossed the paper aside while Jaime reached into his mug for his next one. They'd been stacked one on top of the other for easy grabbing. 

“Oh, look, this one's like yours: 'I'd let Jaime Lannister slam me into the track wall.' Having slammed into several track walls, I cannot recommend it.”

“No, definitely not,” Addam concurred. “Lots of unsexy bruising.” He read his paper and gave a startled laugh. “'Can I suffocate Addam Marbrand with my boobs already?'” 

“What is it with you and suffocation?”

“I honestly don't know! And no, I'm sorry, I don't want to suffocate, even in breasts. I'm sure yours are lovely, though.”

“They must be big, too,” Jaime mused. When Addam looked at him he shrugged. “I mean you have a giant head, can you imagine--” Addam's laughter drowned out the rest of what he was going to say. 

“Fuck off,” Addam said and then glanced at the producer. “Sorry, can we curse?”

“We'll bleep it out or something, don't worry,” the man said, smiling. “You guys are doing great, keep going.” 

Jaime grabbed his next paper. “If I found Jaime Lannister in bed with my girlfriend, I'd cheer her on.'” He laughed into his hand and shook his head. “Thanks, I guess? That feels like a compliment.”

“Yeah, absolutely,” Addam agreed. “'I'd let Addam Marbrand spit on me ANYTIME.' I would never do that, though,” he said to the camera. 

“You're far too much of a gentleman.”

“Exactly. Challenge someone to a duel? One hundred percent. But I would never spit on someone.”

“I don't think you're meant to take these so personally.”

“Spitting just seems so crude.”

Jaime huffed a laugh. “Let' see...ok, well: 'Jaime Lannister could punch me in the face and I'd thank him.' You know who _didn't_ write this tweet?” he said, looking at Brienne and she burst into laughter before covering her mouth with both hands. “He was not grateful,” Jaime said with an innocent smile.

“'I would lick Addam Marbrand all over, to be honest.'” Addam winked at the camera. “I just might let you.”

“You don't even know who sent that.”

“Sure I do, it's, uh,” Addam peered at the paper. “SunSpearMe69.”

Jaime laughed loudly. “All right then, I withdraw my protest.”

“Thank you,” Addam said primly. 

“'Jaime Lannister literally makes me want to set myself on fire from his sexiness. Dial it down!' You definitely wrote this,” he said to Brienne and she made a choking-his-neck pantomime with her hands that sent Jaime into gales of laughter. 

Smiling, Addam reached into his mug. “Just a few left. I'm a little disappointed, honestly, I thought these would be thirstier.” He read his next one and chuckled wryly. “See, this is what I expected more of: 'I would let Addam Marbrand split me in half like a pistachio.'

“Sounds like they're hungry more than thirsty.”

Addam rolled his eyes and gestured at Jaime's mug. “Go.”

“'Jaime Lannister could run me over with his car and I'd still suck that dick' – spelled d i c c.”

“A gentlewoman and a scholar.” 

Jaime snorted. “Last one?”

“No, second-to-last. 'Daddy Addam!' With _several_ exclamation points after it,” he counted quietly. “Eight, in fact. 'Daddy Addam, eight exclamation points, use my face as a trampoline.'” Addam giggled helplessly into his hands, shaking his head. 

“What does that even mean?” Jaime asked, laughing. “Like with your feet?”

Addam just collapsed back into his chair, unable to speak. He waved at Jaime to continue. 

“Should we give you a minute to collect yourself?”

“No,” Addam squeaked. “I'll be fine. Go on.” He was wiping tears away as Jaime pulled out his penultimate paper. 

“'I would lick the beard off of Jaime Lannister's face.' Ah, a beard fan. Thank you.” Jaime rubbed his hand over his chin and jaw, feeling the bristles under his fingers. “I work very hard on it.” 

“Hours in the bathroom each day,” Addam said, apparently having recovered himself. He wiped a few tears of laughter from his eyes. “Primping, preening. I don't know how Brienne puts up with you.”

“Oh, she likes the beard, too,” he said with a suggestive smile and he heard her garbled laugh from behind the camera. 

“She's gonna get you back for that,” Addam said.

“Worth it.” 

“Okay, last one!” With a flourish Addam yanked the last piece of paper out. “This one is a fill-in-the-blank, I guess. 'I want Addam Marbrand to blank me in the blank.'”

“What do you think the blanks were?”

Addam lifted his brows. “Dance me in the moonlight?”

“Very romantic, but I don't think that's what it was.”

“I don't think so either,” Addam said, laughing. “Do your last one.”

Jaime cleared his throat dramatically. “'I want Jaime Lannister to blank the absolute blank out of my blank.' Well.” 

Addam broke down laughing again. “I can't imagine--” 

“I mean the possibilities are endless.”

“They want you to wash the absolute shit out of their car?”

Jaime dropped his head, laughing. “Maybe. Or they want me to kiss the absolute stuffing out of their pets? I am available for any and all dog-kissing.”

“What about cats?”

“Cats are fine, too. Send them to Evenstar Racing, care of Brienne Tarth.” 

She threw her hands up in the air in defeat and Jaime beamed at the camera. “I guess we're done, then. That was Thirsty Tweets.”

“Thank you for watching!” Addam said. 

“And cut!” the producer said, shutting off the camera. “Fantastic, thanks, guys.” While Pia settled what was left to handle with the producer and Addam listened in, Jaime walked over to Brienne. She was grinning at him and shaking her head. 

“What was that about the pets? We're going to get people sending stuffed animals to us now.”

“Then we can donate them to a children's hospital,” he said easily. He kissed her easily, too, and she smiled against his mouth. 

“You know I did write one of those tweets,” she said and he pulled back, his eyebrows raised. 

“Really?” She nodded. “Which one?”

“I want Jaime Lannister to blank the absolute blank out of my blank,” she said, low. 

“What were the blanks?” he murmured. 

Brienne leaned forward and whispered them into his ear. 

“Right, we're out of here,” he said, grabbing her hand and yanking her after him to his car while she squealed in surprised delight. 

“Where are you going?” Addam called out after them. 

“Gonna go act out some thirst tweets,” he yelled back, “and it's not for public consumption!”


	9. DVD Commentary meme: July King's Landing motorcycle ride

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the-world-unseen asked for the DVD commentary meme on tumblr: the July chapter of HFOG! or just the motorcycle ride if that’s too much

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is what it says on the tin, so not any new fic content, but my thoughts on a scene I've already posted. I figured I'd keep all of my HFoG additional content in one place.

All of July is too much for me mentally right now so I’ll do the motorcycle ride. :D This got (unsurprisingly!!) long, so lemme put a Keep Reading cut in real quick.

> A week later, on the off Sunday between Winterfell and Lannisport, Jaime was spending his birthday alone at the office.

I’ll do this whole section, since it being on his birthday was the trigger I used to get Jaime to ask her to go on the bike. This scene was one of like three I had in my head from pretty much the beginning. I find motorcycles extremely sexy (I’m an easy target okay) and I loved the idea of forcing these two knuckleheads into that much physical contact in what should theoretically be a platonic experience; I just had to figure out how to get them there since Brienne just spent the last part of June pushing Jaime back a step. Hard to say no to a lonely man on his birthday though.

> going clubbing until they were both passed out or dead by the end of it. Bronn was home with Lollys, probably having enough sex to stock them up until August, and Jaime wasn’t really close enough with the rest of the crew to consider spending time with them outside of work.

I think this was the month where I decided Bronn was going to be genuinely happy with Lollys. I know I mentioned her early on but I toyed around in my head for awhile with the idea that he was still kind of loose and maybe even unfaithful to her, and I decided I didn’t want to go that way. I wanted to like Bronn in this fic. He’s kind of my Sarcastic Wise Elder character for these two and I really grew to love the idea that he is just as much an inner softie in his heart as Jaime is, that that sharp outer shell/gooey center combo was something that connected them. I think it really helped in the October chapter that Bronn was likable, because then that scene in the hospital between him and Jaime had a much bigger emotional hit.

> The only other person he wanted to see was Brienne and though she’d sent him a ‘happy birthday!’ text that morning unprompted, he hadn’t responded for

I laugh to myself thinking about Brienne hovering over that text message all “should I send a gif? is the text going to be enough? what about emojis? Is it weird if I text him at all? He didn’t tell me it was his birthday but I definitely know it’s his birthday because I have memorized a lot of unimportant facts about a man I am Definitely Not Into.”

> lunch, smoked what he swore was the only cigarette he would have as a thirty-six year old, and then aimlessly watched TV for a few hours before driving his motorcycle into the office.

Jaime uses smoking to fill the hole of the things he wants but believes he’ll never have. At the start of the fic that’s respect and winning races. As he slowly gets those things, he smokes whenever he’s thinking about Brienne, even though he does not realize it consciously. Once he gets all three, he stops smoking for good.

> There had been a scattered handful of engineers there that afternoon, working away in preparation for the different requirements of Lannisport next week, but

Honestly, sometimes remembering there were hundreds of people working on this team in particular was exhausting. I always had this constant voice in the back of my head of Lannister Corp scenes of “where are all these other workers and what are they doing?” It works here because I needed the ride to happen at night, but this is just giving me flashbacks to “oh right this team is actually 500-1000 people, not just these 12.”

> He raised his glass of water to his empty office. “Happy birthday to me,” he muttered, taking a sip. It wasn’t even flavored water, which felt like such a maudlin statement on his life that he couldn’t finish it.

The “it wasn’t even flavored water” line still makes me laugh to this day. It’s one of my favorite moments in the entire story. It’s so DRAMATIC. Like, my god man, get a hold of yourself. Anyway, I love drama queen Jaime.

> He probably should have texted Taena or Melara, but he didn’t want to spend time with them. He didn’t want to listen to his sister’s barely concealed insults

I had a whole bit…I think it was in August? Might have been earlier, I can’t recall now, anyway, two or three paragraphs talking about how Jaime met Melara and Taena and why they all worked out this arrangement and Brynn (rightly) made the point that it didn’t actually add anything to the story I was telling. I managed to cover what really mattered about it in two sentences instead. The moral of this is that this story could have been even longer but Brynn is the best so you should thank her.

> find out what she did on her off days, what kind of birthday cake she liked, if

Chocolate with chocolate and fruit filling and chocolate frosting, FYI.

> Brienne’s worried frown deepened. “Have you done anything for your birthday today?”

> “I had a cigarette.”

> She shook her head, looking disappointed. “Anything that doesn’t shorten your life by doing it?”

I also really like this line. I’m a fan of Worried Mom Friend Brienne, too.

> “I drank some water,” he grumbled.

Unflavored! Like an ANIMAL.

> “Have you even eaten?”

> “I feel like we’ve had this conversation before.”

> She blinked, startled, and then a sheepish grin swarmed over her face. “I guess some things don’t change. At least you didn’t insult me this time.”

> “Progress,” he said, smiling, watching her features go soft and open in a way he’d probably dream about that night. Distance, his brain reminded him.

I didn’t plan for this quiet callback to the sandwich conversation from January, but I really was pleased to see it happen. It makes sense; Brienne wants the people she cares about to take care of themselves and where back in January I think she felt she was being more his Mom, here they’re both aware she’s being his friend and that’s part of why it’s a softer moment.

> “Then come riding with me. Have you been on a motorcycle before?”

> “No. My dad was firmly against it after Galladon died.”

At this point in the fic I was pretty sure Brienne was going to drive although I hadn’t worked out all the details of how I was going to get there yet, but when I wrote this I definitely shored up the “Selwyn is very overprotective” support I’d only just started to build back with the phone call in January. I also knew when I wrote this that Jaime was going to bring the motorcycle to Tarth and her dad was going to be all about it, even though I wasn’t sure how that was going to happen. 

> “Well,” he said, standing slowly, “your dad’s not here now, is he?”

Fun fact: this story idea first appeared to me in relation to Bruce Springsteen’s “I’m On Fire” and there’s a lyric in there - ‘hey little girl is your daddy home, did he go and leave you all alone’ - that this quietly references. And actually I wanted the whole motorcycle ride to have the exact same feeling when you’re reading it as I feel listening to that song! It’s a direct path from there to here emotionally.

(In some other universe instead of this I wrote a fic where Jaime keeps bringing his car in to Selwyn’s Garage just so he can see Brienne, grease smudged on her face, and he asks her to deliver it to his home and she does and, well. It doesn’t go like the video. *g*)

(That video and song were very formative influences on young me though I was not aware of it at the time. If you haven’t heard the song or seen the video, here you go: [https://youtu.be/lrpXArn3hII](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=https%3A%2F%2Fyoutu.be%2FlrpXArn3hII&t=MTczMzM0MmUxNzk2MTcwOTcxMDYyNzY3ZmZjNWRlZWU5ZGZkOWE4NyxVNjd4OWd6Mw%3D%3D&b=t%3Ak0hcR0ZsF-JGxXBITsaeIA&p=https%3A%2F%2Fajoblotofjunk.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F612851088743366656%2Fdvd-commentary-for-the-july-chapter-of-hfog-or&m=1))

Jaime arched an eyebrow. “My bike is plenty big.”

> Brienne snorted but the red in her cheeks spread out to her crooked her nose and down the freckled length of her long neck. “Sounds like you’re compensating, Lannister.”

> _I could show you_ he thought but he bit it back, as well as the image of pushing her against the door of his office and- _No. Bad._ he told both his errant thoughts and his twitching cock like they were misbehaving dogs. 

Jaime has been horny for her since April (January though he would refuse to acknowledge it if you told him that at this point), give him a break.

> He came around the desk and held out his hand and she stared down at it like it was a snake she was trying to decide was poisonous or not.

> Brienne gingerly wrapped her long fingers around his

I wanted Brienne to actively participate in the decision to do this, to show through her actions (not just Jaime’s perceptions of her) that she wants this, too. I had to ramp things up for both of them in this chapter because I knew what was coming in August and I wanted them to be ready for that. I couldn’t have gone from where they were in June to the kiss in August, I had to force them together in a way they hadn’t intended so that when they come together intentionally it feels like a natural progressions, and that meant both of them had to be wanting it.

> _What are you doing?_ his brain demanded as he led Brienne through the empty corridors out to the front parking lot.

> _Enjoying my birthday for once._

I like this because it’s both Jaime making excuses for why he’s doing something really foolish if he’s supposed to be keeping his distance but ALSO true and a sad reflection on his life (and what Brienne brings to it even now).

> His bike was parked in Tywin’s CEO spot, where he always parked as a small, childish fuck you to his father. Brienne gasped as they walked up, pulling her hand away to brush the gleaming chrome.

> “You have an Iron Throne!”

I know. I KNOW. But I love calling it that. I cast around for motorcycle names for awhile and when I hit on this I could not resist. Iron Thrones in this fic world are basically those giant Harleys that would easily seat two people.

> weight of her against his palms. Brienne’s eyes narrowed and he worried for a second she’d heard his thoughts. “It’s not safe to ride without a helmet though, and I don’t have one. Do you have an extra?”

> Jaime hadn’t brought his today, either. “We could wear driving helmets.”

As I recall it, Brynn came up with the idea of the helmet scene or at least definitely helped me work out how it was going to go when I got stuck on it. She made the point it should be a cute moment between them and it was right because it made the whole ride seem fun instead of just weighty and tense. The fact they actually have FUN together is really important to me because I think it’s really important to successful relationships in general. If you’re going to be with this person for the rest of you life, I hope like hell you enjoy spending time with them.

> When she saw the helmet he had she laughed, the sound bursting up into the sky like a flock of startled birds.

I’m not usually happy with how I describe things - I never feel like it’s as interesting or descriptive or powerful as I want - but I do like this line a lot.

> “It’s a helmet,” he said, holding it out to her. The helmet was a bright neon green and covered with frogs forming the words MOAT CAILIN with their bodies. “I got it from one of our sponsors a few years ago and kept it thinking someday I’d wear it just to piss off my father.”

What does Moat Cailin do? I genuinely have no idea.

> Brienne took the helmet and held it out away from her like it was a very stinky baby. “You’re sure no one is going to see us?”

> “Now who’s vain?”

This made me laugh. I love when Brienne gets to be light-hearted.

> “Isn’t there some biker lingo you should use instead?”

> “Hop on my hog, sexy mama?”

Goofy Jaime: also a personal favorite. This is kind of an early insight into how he’s going to be in later months when he’s truly, unburdenedly (I made that word up) happy.

> Brienne laughed even harder that time and shook her head. “You are so annoying,” she said fondly, climbing on behind him.

The “you’re annoying”/”you’re stubborn” back and forth is something I have been trying to consistently but not overwhelmingly carry through this fic from very early on.

> “Since you’ve never ridden before, the primary rule is that you have to lean into the curves with me. If you’re balanced differently than I am it might bring the whole bike down.

Having ridden a motorcycle: this is actually true. It was the first thing the person I was riding with told me.

> Her arms fully encircled his waist, her body pressed so firmly against his back he imagined he could feel the weight of her small breasts through his own shirt. He had no jacket but he didn’t need one; even if it hadn’t been for the drowsy summer heat, Brienne’s warmth against him stoked enough fire he could have burned all night.

You shouldn’t ride a motorcyle without proper gear, kids, but Jaime doesn’t give a fuck and for the purpose of this kind of intimate contact, neither do I for this story.

> It was almost like sex, the way they moved together around the curves, the blood thrumming in his veins, her occasional breathless gasp. He had to shift a little on his seat to make room for his awkward erection, but he pressed the bike faster, the curves tighter, until she was welded against him and the wind whipped her joyful laughter from her mouth, leaving it like tracers behind them in the dark. 

This is the image in my head when I thought of them on the motorcycle ride. Everything before and after this paragraph is just set up and pay off for this one part.

> Centuries ago there had been a keep at the top of Aegon’s High Hill, but all that was left now were old stones weathered by time and the salt air off of Blackwater Bay.

Thank goodness for the internet, and people who post very detailed maps of King’s Landing and Westeros so I can figure out some of this stuff. I have spent a surprising amount of time for this fic looking at maps.

> “Why were you at work today?” he asked, staring at her.

> Brienne pulled off her hoodie to reveal a tank top underneath, her muscular shoulders bunching as she did so in a way that made his mouth go dry.

There’s a gif that was being posted in the Oathkeepers discord around the time I was writing this that I had in mind explicitly for this moment.

> Her skin seemed to absorb the light, making it white and smooth as milkglass, her freckles mirroring the infinite stars. “Truthfully,” she said, “I wanted to spend some time alone with the car.” Even in the moonlight the reddening of her pale cheeks was clear.

Survey says: Mostly true. She also was thinking of him, since it was his birthday. She genuinely did NOT expect him to be there, though.

> Jaime walked to the edge of the flat gravel and stared across the Rush to roughly where he thought Tarth would be way down south in the Stormlands. It had been years since he’d been and he didn’t remember it well, but he wished he could so he could picture Brienne there.

Again, I knew he was going to be in Tarth the very next chapter, so I wanted to lay the groundwork for it to seem natural he would be. Bringing it up here was a perfect opportunity for that.

> They put their helmets back on, and Brienne her hoodie, and she climbed on behind him again, her arms automatically curling around his waist this time instead of the distant grip of the start. He started the engine and leaned forward a little, and she leaned her head against his shoulder as they took the drive down more slowly.

This easy warmth was important, too. Again, the sexual tension is critical to get them to their breaking point because they’re sure as hell not going to talk about how much they care about each other first (or even for a long while after they start having sex, as we discover), but I wanted there to be something deeper to their bond, too, a connection that I could build on in the second half of the story where you believe they’ll be happy together as an established couple. That they’re comfortable together.

> The trip down the hill was as solemn as the stars above and when he parked again in front of the Lannister Corp Racing offices Brienne took her helmet off and stared quietly at him when he remained seated, his visor pushed up.

I think subconsciously this is when Brienne really falls in love with him, because it’s just Jaime being Jaime, and sharing something important to him with her and that kind of openness is the key to her heart.

> Sadness gleamed like the stars in her big twilight eyes. Brienne put a hand on his shoulder and his whole body went rigid under her touch. Her fingers crept to the nape of his neck under his helmet, softly brushed through the short hair there before she dragged them away again as her pale skin reddened. 

Brienne was more reserved here in the initial draft of this and Brynn thought there should be more and she was - as usual - absolutely right. So the touch was added to fully seal the momentous connection that happened here.

> “You can get home okay?” he asked.

> “I’ll take the bus, there’s a stop just by the sports bar.”

Brienne the Bus Rider strikes again. Hee.

> He couldn’t even quit smoking; how was he ever going to quit wanting Brienne?

These two things are connected here for a reason! As noted above. Hee.

Wow this was fun for me, thank you for asking!


	10. DVD Commentary meme: Favorite line

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> twelvemonkeyswere asked for the DVD Commentary meme on tumblr: Hey! What about a commentary for your most favorite line in HFoG?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I answered these back before I'd even crossed the 300k word mark, which is a really hilarious look back at my mindset then, too. Heh.

My (current) most favorite line is from November (part 1) of HFoG! Here’s the lead up to the actual line, which I bolded.

> She flushed. “Is it so surprising? I never stopped wanting you.”

> “Even now?”

> “More than ever.” He’d captivated her since her father’s garage, back when he’d been arrogant and angry, when his love of the cars had been, she thought, the truest thing about him; now that she knew all his curves and straightaways, it would be impossible to stop wanting him. It was her turn to move nearer. “I never would have ended things between us if your father hadn’t stepped in.”

> Jaime tilted his head and gave her a small, sad smile. “Yes, you would’ve.”

> “No.” Brienne shook her head. “It wasn’t what I wanted.”

> “Maybe not then,” he said, “but it would’ve been eventually.” He tenderly cupped her face with his palm, a warm pressure that made her shut her eyes for just a moment to enjoy the feel of him again. They were together every day and still she missed him. “You wanted us to keep things secret because you needed to protect yourself, and I did it but I never really understood why. I understand it now. But I also understand that I couldn’t have done it the way you needed me to. Truthfully, I could never do it.” His fingers slid to her neck, tightening there, and he tugged her head down to press his forehead to hers. “ **I cannot love you quietly.”**

I mean, look. I am well aware that I will probably never write a line more concise and yet full of everything about both who a character is and how a relationship will be, while also being straight-up romantic. I’m happy I got the one, though!

And I also think it’s a very TRUE sentiment and gets at why what was between them really would have failed whether Tywin had intervened or not. It was already starting to come apart before Tywin even stepped in, and they would have both fought to hold onto it long past when it would have been healthy for either of them. And I love that it’s Jaime who gets to realize that because it’s such a big point of emotional growth for him, which is why the line (I think?) resonates so well. In August he was sure he could do it but in November he knows himself so much better and he’ll be happier for that in the long run.

Dragonzair asked me in the comments how I came up with it and I said this:

> It came to me actually while I was writing an earlier Jaime section. I had him thinking a similar thought to himself initially; in that version it was something like “he could only love her loudly” which I loved the sentiment of because I love this idea of Jaime just understanding both who he is as a person (MAYER OF FEELINGSTOWN) and in particular the depth of his feelings for Brienne and how those things combine together. And I really wanted him to SAY IT because it’s super romantic and Brienne deserved to hear that. So I pulled it out of that earlier section (there’s a hint of it still in the story; I can’t remember if it’s in this chapter or not, where he thinks something similar) and tucked it away for when the had this discussion (I knew even when I was writing September that they’d get to this point where he can’t love her in secret again) and then realized as I wrote it that it made a better impact with the ‘cannot.’ It’s more of a giving himself over to who he is statement than ‘I can only,’ for some reason.

> So, a little planning, a little wild inspiration. Hee.

I will also say I re-wrote the paragraph around it several times for maximum emotional impact. The forehead touch happened later for several drafts before I decided to double-whammy with it and his pronouncement.

I also kind of regret that I needed to deploy it so (relatively) early in the overall story. it HAD to be here, I wouldn’t change that, I just sometimes worry that in terms of the romance angle it feels like an end-of-the-fic moment and I have kept going 100,000 words PAST it. Which has been a long-standing worry of mine with this story in general, even though *I* feel like I need to tell all of it. I would have felt like things were incomplete if I’d stopped here or when they get back together in February. I want everyone to get what they deserve and I could have served up a heavily summarized epilogue that accomplished this, but (and Brynn will attest to this as I’ve worried over it many times to her) it felt wrong to jam all of Brienne’s year into one or even two-three chapters. I think the payoff is worth it. But if not, we’ve always got this line. Hee.


	11. Collected fanart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Links to fanart for Heart Full of Gasoline! I've been so lucky to have people create some truly AMAZING fanart for Heart Full of Gasoline and I wanted to collect links to all of it in a single place so others can appreciate them, too!

  * [Lannister Racing moodboard](https://ajoblotofjunk.tumblr.com/post/189178395827/private-witt-heart-full-of-gasoline-by) by private-witt
  * [Evenstar Racing logo](https://ajoblotofjunk.tumblr.com/post/190613512857/ajoblotofjunk-ajoblotofjunk-ajoblotofjunk) by shipping-receiving
  * [Jaime and Brienne drawing](https://ajoblotofjunk.tumblr.com/post/619489553054646272) by gemikanixiii
  * [Brienne in her Evenstar Racing gear](https://ajoblotofjunk.tumblr.com/post/618018156353634304/dragonzair-procrastinating-rn-but-i-needed-to) by dragonzair
  * [Mock-up of F1 Racing magazine with Jaime on the cover](https://ajoblotofjunk.tumblr.com/post/618545278403903488/naomignome-i-love-ajoblotofjunk-s-fic-heart) by NaomiGnome
  * [Jaime and Brienne Picrews](https://ajoblotofjunk.tumblr.com/post/620381996188827648/jb-picrew) by hillaryschu
  * [Evenstar Racing moodboard](https://ajoblotofjunk.tumblr.com/post/621353263840788480/onefenix-heart-full-of-gasoline-by) by onefenix
  * [Evenstar Racing moodboard follow-up with incredible Brag Board addition](https://ajoblotofjunk.tumblr.com/post/621746853841633280/onefenix-thought-id-post-the-individual) by onefenix
  * [HFoG F1 Teams Summary Slideshow](https://ajoblotofjunk.tumblr.com/post/622052081601298432/i-made-a-slide-show-on-hfog-teams#notes) by naomignome (I don't know how to describe this except it's WILD in the best way)
  * [Another Jaime and Brienne drawing](https://gemikanxiii.tumblr.com/post/625631489761099776/kofisformamamay-batch-11) by gemikanixiii ("I cannot love you quietly" scene)




	13. Drive to Survive Westeros: Competitive Spirit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In Brienne's second year of professional racing, the competition isn't just on the track. 
> 
> (In response to a tumblr ask for a little bit more about Brienne & Robb's friendly off-track activities.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> On tumblr, Naomignome asked: "May I have head canons and/or some crumbs of what came of Brienne and Robb's lil skill rivalry in HFOG, please?"
> 
> Since I’ve been poking at my Drive to Survive Westeros idea a bit with the real life race season underway, you get your answer in the form I intend to write that someday.

Over a shot of the blue Evenstar Racing car zooming down a long straight, we hear Brienne Tarth’s voice. 

“I thought I knew what to expect when I started driving in Formula 1.”

There’s a shot of her crash in her first race, then her first podium in Harrenhal. 

“But I really wasn’t prepared for this.”

We cut to a shot of the sun burning bright, before panning down to a small crowd of people cheering. 

“You’ve got this!” someone shouts. 

“Twenty-one, twenty-two, twenty-three-” a male voice counts. 

We see that it’s Brienne Tarth’s race engineer - and husband - Jaime Lannister-Tarth, and he’s staring with great intensity at something as he counts, which is soon revealed to be Brienne doing push-ups. Next to her, Direwolf driver Robb Stark is also doing push-ups. They’re both in tank tops, and sweating. Robb’s race engineer, Raynald Westerling, is counting for him.

“I knew about all of the social media bits,” Brienne says in the interview space. There’s a plain black background behind her. She’s wearing a black t-shirt with the Evenstar Racing logo emblazoned across the front in blue. Her blonde hair is tucked behind her ears and she looks slightly uncomfortable, though not unhappy. There’s a scar on her cheek. 

“But usually they’re competitions between teammates,” she continues.

“You didn’t have a teammate last season,” the interviewer says.

“No. And I didn’t intend to challenge Robb, it just sort of happened.”

There’s a brief clip of Brienne in a noisy bar. She cracks a walnut between her head and shoulder and there’s a bunch of joyful yelling. 

“It’s all in good fun.” Robb Stark is in the interview space now. He’s wearing his Direwolf Nomex top, and he’s smiling very widely. He looks entirely relaxed in front of the cameras. “Brienne is a fantastic competitor, and I know that first season was difficult for her, being the only woman. It was my own way of trying to make her feel more welcome.” 

Brienne smiles in the interview space. “Is that what he said? I thought it was to try to save his ego.” 

There is a quick shot of the two of them on jetskis, then snowmobiles, and then throwing hatchets. 

“We tied at the end of last season,” Robb says.

It cuts to Jaime in the interview space, and he leans forward a little, his eyes shining. “They won’t be tied for long.” 

Back at the push-up contest, Brienne is already at thirty-eight while Robb has fallen to thirty-six. The gap extends from there until Arya Stark - Robb’s sister and Evenstar Racing’s Chief Engineer - presses a button on her phone and shouts: “Time’s up!”

Jaime whoops and punches his natural fist in the air. He has a prosthetic on his right hand. “Take that, Young Wolf!” 

The two drivers lay on the ground for a moment and look at each other. They’re both clearly exhausted, faces red and shoulders trembling. 

“I pick the next one,” Robb pants. 

We cut to Ned Stark, Direwolf’s Team Principal, now in the interview space. He is not smiling, which isn’t unusual for him. “This sort of competitiveness can be a good outlet for teammates, but having it between teams may bring up additional complications during a race.”

“What are you worried about?” the interviewer asks.

Ned gives a long-suffering sigh. “That Brienne will continue to beat my son and he’ll let it affect his race days.” 

Robb laughs loudly. “Never,” he insists. “My father has never been great at having fun, and that’s all this is: a little fun.” 

“It doesn’t bother you that Brienne Tarth is also near you in the World Championship rankings?”

Robb shrugs his shoulders, but his smile is suddenly very thin. “Of course not.”

“I think it’s healthy,” Addam Marbrand, Evenstar’s new Team Principal, says in the interview room. His smile is much brighter and more genuine than Robb’s had been a moment before. “Besides, Brienne’s gonna kick his ass. Can we say that?” 

“Yes,” the interviewer affirms, laughing a little. 

“Good. Then she’s gonna kick his fucking ass.”

The two drivers are standing in front of individual tables, each with a bowl of marshmallows on top of it. Brienne and Robb look equally skeptical. 

“I thought of the marshmallow one,” Pia Whent, Evenstar’s Public Relations Director says proudly. 

We see her standing in front of the drivers with her ever-present cellphone at the ready. 

“Whoever eats the most in a minute wins,” Pia says. The small crowd of Direwolf and Evenstar crew cheer their drivers. “Ready... go!”

Although Brienne makes a valiant effort, Robb clearly pulls ahead, and she slows down noticeably once she realizes it, too. By the time Pia calls time, Robb’s bowl is half-empty, and his cheeks are puffed from the marshmallows he’s still working on. Jaime plucks a marshmallow from Brienne’s bowl and eats it, grinning at her. She grimaces at him. 

“I didn’t win that one,” Brienne says in the interview room. Her wide face splits with a smile. “But I also didn’t get sick afterward.” 

“They won’t stop,” Ned groans. There’s a small compilation: Brienne in her potato sack crossing a makeshift finish line ahead of Robb. Robb and Brienne spinning around with their foreheads pressed to the butt of their baseball bats, then standing and wobbling as they try to make for the goal. Robb - barely - gets there first, and they both stumble to their knees when they’re done. The two of them on tiny little bikes, pedaling furiously. Although Brienne is much taller than Robb, she still manages to coast ahead of him by a significant margin. 

“it might be getting a little out of hand,” Addam says with a rueful laugh.

There’s a reflex test, which Robb wins, and a swimming test in Lannisport that Brienne easily wins. Onscreen there’s a graphic: at the top, the World Championship standings, animated replicas of their cars driving left-to-right to show where they are in the points race; at the bottom, their social media competition, hashmarks showing who has won more. Robb is ahead at the top, and Brienne at the bottom. 

The screen goes black. Then in plain white text it says: LAST RACE OF THE SEASON.

“Brienne is close to you in the championship standings,” the interviewer says and Robb smirks.

“I wouldn’t say _close_ , exactly. In order to beat me I’d have to get no points this weekend and she’d have to come in first. That’s very unlikely to happen.”

“That’s what happened last year.” 

A flash of Robb and Ramsay Bolton crashing in the King’s Landing Grand Prix from last season, his car spinning out into the apron, and then Brienne’s car flying just ahead of Lancel Lannister’s Lannister Corp Racing car under the checkered flag. 

“Last year was definitely unexpected,” Robb admits. “But this is a very different season.” 

Brienne nods, looking serious. “I’ll drive my best, but Robb has had another fantastic season. I will be happy to come in second to someone of that talent.” Then she bites her lip and gives a small smile. it’s obvious she’s fighting back a much bigger grin. “But I do look forward to beating him in our social media competition.” 

Cut to a shot of Robb coming in first in the Grand Prix, punching the air from his cockpit, and the commentators congratulating him on his World Championship. The previous graphic comes back onscreen, and his car crosses the Driver Championship line before Brienne’s. It fades out and then the hashmarks take up the screen. 

“What’s the last challenge?” the interviewer asks Jaime. 

"Tug-of-war,” he says proudly. “I thought of this one.”

“Do you think Robb has a chance to win?”

Jaime laughs, and doesn’t stop.

There’s a thick rope lying in the green grass in the middle of the King’s Landing Grand Prix. There are noticeably more crew there, as well as several other drivers: Jon Snow, Robb’s teammate, and Drogo Khal, one of the Dothrak drivers, who is standing on Brienne’s side, talking animatedly to her. Loras Tyrell and Renly Baratheon are there as well, standing side-by-side. Their hands are brushing. 

Brienne and Robb meet at the center of the rope and shake hands and then it cuts to them pulling with all of their might, grunting and digging their feet into the grass until it turns to churned up dirt under their feet. Robb is losing ground steadily, but he’s fighting for it as hard as he can. 

In the end, though, it’s not contest. Brienne gives a loud, warrior-like yell and throws her entire body backward, and Robb goes careening forward, over the line and then onto his knees in the grass. Brienne drops the rope and bends over, planting her hands on her knees while Jaime rubs her back and chatters excitedly at her. 

Pia appears between them with a trophy with a big, golden walnut on top, which she presents to Brienne, who stands and takes it with a laugh. Robb climbs to his feet and pats her on the back. 

“Next year I’m coming for her trophy,” he says in the interview space. He looks happy, if tired. 

“Next year I’m coming for his,” Brienne says. She smiles, a fierce, determined baring of teeth. 


	14. The MOT Test

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “We'll get your car all taken care of,” he said in a voice that suggested she may not understand what he was saying. “You're familiar with a MOT test?”
> 
> “Yes,” she said slowly. “I actually--”
> 
> “Great. Don't worry, you've come to the most trustworthy mechanic in King's Landing. There are magazines for you in the lobby. Your boyfriend can come with me and I'll explain everything to him. I know how you women hate to get dirty.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So. SEVERAL people @'d me on tumblr with [this post](https://samirant.tumblr.com/post/632447621699665920) and frankly who am I to look a gift prompt in the mouth? (Also: I was truly delighted every time someone thought of HFOG Brienne with this, so THANK YOU.)
> 
> (Also for those Americans who, like me, had no idea what a MOT Test was: it's like a smog test in overdrive.)
> 
> Idk if this was what people wanted, but I enjoyed writing it at least! Content warning for Boros Blount being a straight-up misogynistic bag of dicks.

“I really appreciate you coming with me,” Peck said as Brienne parked the car in the MOT test waiting lane. “Last year the guy checked my car and said I needed a ton of engine work, but I don't know enough to know if that's true or not. He passed me eventually, but I feel better having you here.” 

Brienne nodded, peering up at the sign: _Blount's Auto_. “Of course, Peck. It's the least I can do.” 

The technician, a broad man with oddly short legs and a flat nose, gestured for them to get out. They walked over and Brienne was just holding her hand out to shake when the man turned to Peck. 

“Welcome to Blount's,” he said, holding out his hand to Peck. They shook and the man shoved his hands in the pockets of his mechanic overalls, ignoring Brienne. “What can I do for you?” 

“We're here for a MOT test,” Peck said. 

“Right. Keys?” 

Brienne, who'd driven so Peck could get some work done on the way, handed the keys over and the man gave her a watery, insincere smile. 

“We'll get your car all taken care of,” he said in a voice that suggested she may not understand what he was saying. “You're familiar with a MOT test?”

“Yes,” she said slowly. “I actually--”

“Great. Don't worry, you've come to the most trustworthy mechanic in King's Landing. There are magazines for you in the lobby. Your boyfriend can come with me and I'll explain everything to him. I know how you women hate to get dirty.”

Brienne blinked, dumbfounded. She'd been through her share of misogynistic jerks, but she'd grown up in a garage and had always fixed her own cars; she'd never had to suffer through a random mechanic treating her like this before. “I think I'd like to stay with my friend,” she said tightly. 

The technician – Boros, from his nametag – shrugged. “If you insist. I'll try to make it understandable for you.” 

When he turned around, Brienne looked over at Peck, who had the same, shocked _can you believe this guy?_ look on his face. 

“You two wait over there and I'll drive your car into the lift.” They did as directed, standing uncomfortably while Boros parked the car in the text zone. 

Boros rolled down the window once he'd parked, and he started fiddling around with the steering wheel and seat. “First, I check the structural integrity of the inside,” he said through the open window. “Have to make sure you haven't broken the seats or messed up any of the buttons looking for the radio.” 

Brienne struggled to keep the interested smile on her face. 

“Oh this isn't good,” Boros said. “Your brake pedal feels mushy. I'm going to make a note of that.” 

“What do you mean 'mushy'?” Brienne asked. 

He looked up. “Right,” he sighed, as though she'd asked him to write her a thesis on the subject. “Why don't you let me do my full test and then we can go over each item one at a time? I don't have time to explain it all to you as I go.”

Brienne grunted and crossed her arms over her chest. “Fine.” 

The test took awhile and every part of the car got checked – wipers and lights, doors and tires, a complete overview of the engine, first from under the hood and then under the car itself when he raised it. The entire time, Boros made little disappointed noises, making marks on his clipboard. Brienne had checked Peck's car herself ahead of time and she was well-aware that it was in perfectly fine condition. It could use some new spark plugs, maybe, and an oil change, and the fan belt would need tightening in a few months, but the level of concern in Boros' face when he finally headed towards them again was not in any way warranted. 

“This seems bad,” Peck said, worry on his thin face. 

“Your car is fine,” she said quietly. “If he says otherwise, he's lying to you. Let me handle this.”

“Gladly,” Peck breathed in relief. 

“Well,” Boros said, with a Very Concerned Look. Brienne resisted rolling her eyes. “It's a good thing you brought your car to me,” he said. “Very good thing. I have some real concerns here about it.” He turned to Peck, even though Brienne had been the one to ask the first question. “Let me show you a few things.” 

He motioned for Peck to follow him, who glanced curiously at Brienne and she just nodded and followed silently behind. 

“First thing, look at this wheel movement.” He set the clipboard down and started fiddling with the wheel, turning it wide. 

“Is that bad?” Peck asked. 

Boros nodded solemnly. “It needs to be tightened or the wheel might come right off.” 

Brienne choked on her own surprise, and the two men turned towards her. “Are you all right?” Peck asked. She waved at them to continue, coughing out the last of it. 

“Sorry, yeah, just swallowed wrong.” 

“Some women hate to swallow,” Boros said, not quietly enough, and nudged Peck with his elbow. Peck looked like he wanted to sink into the floor and disappear. “So you haven't heard about this happening with a tire before?”

“No?” Peck said. “I'm not really... cars aren't my thing.” 

“Oh that's fine, you'll pick it up. Men have a natural instinct for this sort of thing.” 

Brienne clamped her lips together to keep from saying anything yet. She wanted to give Boros plenty of rope. 

He took Peck on the most imaginative exploration of a car that Brienne had ever seen. Things that were well within normal were deemed “impossible to pass”; items that weren't even broken he indicated as “you better fix this immediately before it leaves you stranded in the middle of rush hour traffic.” When he pointed to the timing belt and called it the scariest driving belt he'd ever seen,” Brienne had to excuse herself to pretend to take a phone call so she didn't ream him a new one there. 

She knew Boros was talking out of his ass, but he hadn't technically done anything illegal yet, and she wanted to see what his charge were going to be before she stepped in. By the time she got back, they were done and Boros was typing everything into his computer. 

“Is it bad?” she asked Peck who shrugged. 

“He says he's going to have to do some fixes immediately, before we can even drive it off the lot.” 

“He's full of crap,” she hissed and Peck stared, owl-eyed at her. 

“What are you gonna do?”

“I'm going to see what he's proposing and then show him all the ways he's wrong.” 

A positively gleeful smile stole over Peck's face. “Do you mind if I record this?” he whispered, and Brienne shook her head. She'd been in the media machine for two full years now, she knew the power of a well-placed video clip. 

“Pia would be furious if you didn't,” she whispered back. He grinned and pulled out his phone, keeping it on but low so it wasn't obvious. 

Boros swaggered over, a sheaf of papers in his hand. “Like I said, it's a real good thing you came here. I can work my magic on a few items and make sure you pass, but since you have a couple of immediate fixes here, if you just leave the car with me I can give you a discount to do all the work at once. I feel bad for you, getting hit with all this, it's the least I can do.” 

“Can I see that?” Brienne asked, gesturing at the papers. 

Boros squinted at her. “It won't help you, ma'am, it's just a list of parts and things. I'm sure your friend can explain it all to you later.” 

“I'd really like to see it,” she insisted, and took the papers out of his hand, scanning them quickly while he gaped at her. The list of items was absurd, and she felt a boiling fury start in her stomach. Who knew how many people this man had cheated? There was no way she was going to let him get away with it another minute. “I have some questions,” she said, not bothering to keep her tone pleasant. “Let's start with the brake pedal.” 

“Uh...” Boros glanced at Peck who just smiled innocently at him. “All right.”

“You said the pedal was 'mushy.' On the sheet you wrote that it wasn't responding within appropriate values and claimed that the brake fluid was low. Can you show me the brake fluid levels?”

“I... why?”

“I would just be very surprised to find them low, Peck had all of the fluid levels checked this morning.” 

Boros gestured vaguely at the sheet. “That one must have a mistake. But the pedal _is_ soft, so if it's not the fluid, it's probably something even more serious, like air in the line. Or a weak seal in master cylinder!” he said, looking downright giddy. 

“Which is it?” Brienne asked. 

“What?”

“If you made a mistake, you must know what you meant. Does the line need to be bled or do you need to replace the seal?”

Brienne could see the light slowly turning on in Boros' brain. These were not questions he normally received, and assuredly not from a woman. Not that Brienne doubted there were women who knew to ask them, just that he didn't seem the type to register those questions had even been asked. “It's the seal,” he said with less enthusiasm.

“Show me.”

“Sh-show you?”

“Yes, show me. I'd like to see the wear on it, since those seals were replaced less than a year ago and Peck doesn't drive enough for the kind of wear that would result in the type of work you're suggesting.” 

“Um.” Boros looked to Peck for assistance, but Peck just shrugged. 

“Women. What are you gonna do?” Peck said cheerfully. 

“If they did get replaced, then the mechanic who did it took you for a ride,” Boros said with a second wind of bluster. “You should sue him.” 

Brienne pursed her lips and put on her best confused look. “It would be very surprising to discover that,” she said. “Given it was my father who did it.” 

Boros laughed nervously, and when they didn't laugh with him he cleared his throat and made to reach for the paperwork. Brienne held it out of reach. 

“I must have not had the light on it correctly, that's my bad. I can just take that off the list.” 

“That would be great,” Brienne said. “Now, let's talk tires.”

With clipped, surgical precision, Brienne walked Boros through every single item on his list with the same, relentless questioning. “You said this,” she started for each finding, and then she asked him why he said it, and then she showed him why he was wrong. 

By the time they'd gotten halfway through, Boros was sweating profusely. By the time they finished, he was furious. 

“Is this some kind of setup?” he snapped when Brienne slammed the hood closed after showing him the difference between the timing belt and the drive belt, and why both were in good condition. She wiped her hands on a nearby cloth and then tossed it onto the bench. 

“You think we set you up to try to cheat us?” she asked, tapping into the anger she'd worked so hard to keep banked as his lies had fallen apart. 

“I think you're a smug, know-it-all bitch who gets off on making men feel puny. Easy to do, given your size,” he spit, and Brienne's hands clenched into fists at her side. “Do you have an earpiece or something? Who's telling you all this? Is it you?” he asked Peck, who shook his head. 

Brienne pulled out her own phone, scrolled through the photos to one she'd saved of her in the pit when she'd been Chief Mechanic for Jaime's car, and held it out to Boros. “It's all me,” she said proudly, and Boros' rage-flush fled, leaving him pale. 

“Are you fucking kidding?” he asked. “What, you-you work on tires or something?” 

“Chief Mechanic,” Peck told him. “Well, she was, for Jaime Lannister. You've heard of him?” 

Boros' eyes were huge as he nodded. “I don't follow racing, but everybody knows him.” 

“Now she's a driver for LanniStar racing. A world championship-winning driver, as a matter of fact.” 

“ _You're_ Brienne Tarth?” 

“Lannister-Tarth,” she said, smiling tightly. “Now. Are you going to give my friend his _real_ MOT test, or are we going to have to take his car somewhere else? Either way, we're posting this video to the internet.” Peck waved his phone at Boros. “I'm almost at a million followers. I could say you've cleaned up your act when I post it, if you actually will.” 

“Fuck you,” he said, though it lacked conviction. 

Unfortunately for him, Brienne didn't.

* * *

That night, Pia posted a highlights version of the video to Brienne's social media account with: _Even female f1 drivers still run into misogyny! Don't get cheated by bad mechanics! And never take your car to Blount's Autos!_

She texted Brienne when it was up, and Brienne showed it to Jaime. 

After he'd cursed up a storm, threatened to shut down Blount's Auto himself and have Boros' license revoked, and then watched the beginning part three more times growing more delighted with every repetition, he asked if they could play naughty mechanic. 

This time, no one took video.


End file.
